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Late Lunchtime Links: How to both resign and make your former employer think it’s the most amazing investment bank in the world

The art of the exit

Never burn your bridges. Never do a Greg Smith. Never write a letter of resignation that is anything other than deeply regretful. Never attend an exit interview in which you say a negative word about anyone you’ve worked with.

Michael Rubinoff, the (former) chairman of Global Corporate & Investment Banking at Bank of America shows the way. Despite leaving in a possible huff after losing his position as co-head of Global Corporate & Investment, Rubinoff appears to have orchestrated an exit which left Tom Montag under the impression that he would have loved to work there forever and ever.

Indeed, so impressed was Montag by Rubinoff’s devotion that he felt moved to refer to it in a memo announcing Rubinoff’s departure. Montag memo-ed the entire bank to inform them that…

“…Michael said to me when discussing his decision, “Since the day we announced the merger of Bank of America and Merrill Lynch, I have been convinced that we have the people and platform to become the world’s leading integrated corporate and investment bank. I feel fortunate to have had the opportunity to work with the remarkably talented team of dedicated and committed people at BofA Merrill.”

All those people should now feel:  a) regret that Rubinoff’s removed himself; b) keen to help find him a new position. This, is how it’s done.

Meanwhile:

Bob is on track to lose half his bonus. (Telegraph) 

“With BarCap revenues up 91% quarter on quarter or 3% year on year, the overall result is, as Bob [Diamond] had promised, very pleasing.” (Financial News)

Deutsche Bank’s corporate banking and securities division, which houses its giant sales and trading operation, generated close to 80% of the group’s clean pre-tax profit in the first quarter. (Financial News) 

Morgan Stanley has hired a head of electronic trading for Asia from Morgan Stanley. (Bloomberg) 

Actually, HSBC is cutting 3,167 jobs and most of them will be middle and senior management. (Telegraph) 

First quarter profits at Evercore fell 62% year on year. The compensation ratio is now 81% on a US GAAP basis. (Bloomberg)

“Our people have to face those pressures, as they have also had to face loss of personal savings, loss of pride and confidence, and the loss of over 35,000 jobs. It is uncomfortable to work at RBS.” (CityAm)

RBS M&A bankers are planning to spin out a boutique that will be led by John McIntyre. 45 bankers will join and RBS may have a minority stake. (Reuters)

Lloyd believes Goldman is: “totally the right size.” (BusinessInsider)

“The biggest threat to Goldman Sachs, the existential threat to Goldman Sachs, was the poor performance and bad risk management practices of some of our competitors with whom we had relationships.” (BusinessInsider)  

The general public “wasn’t part of our audience” and not seen as an important communications constituency, Blankfein said: “Shame on us.” (WSJ)

Eton-educated Alex Wilmot Sitwell is the son of a chairman of SG Warburg. (CityAm)

Man Group began life as a barrel maker. (Bloomberg)

Does your CVA hedge generate CVA?. (Deus Ex Macchiato)

Comments (1)

Comments
  1. then go stick pins into a wax model of your erstwhile boss, pray like hell that the bstarreds lose their boots in the next banking scandal and bore the knickers off your friends about how grim they are. And rise, my phoenix, rise. Success is the best revenge.

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