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Morning Coffee: Ex-Deutsche Bank trader preparing infants for banking careers. When promising jobs don’t pan out

Anke Gosch

Prepare early for numerical tests

It’s not every parent who has their child’s education and career planned out by the age of three. But some do. And those parents might approach Anke Gosch, a former Deutsche Bank trader who has launched a new career helping aspirational adults get their children into London’s best nursery schools.

“Wealthy parents often told me they felt it was negligent not to hire someone to help them with this process from the very beginning,” Gosch told the Financial Times, adding that a top nursery is seen as a “stepping stone” to Harvard or Oxbridge. Many of Gosch’s clients are American and many work in finance. One had his child’s future mapped out for him: ‘Cambridge University, then Deutsche Bank.”

Separately, things aren’t working out so well for anyone who joined Pimco’s lovely new equities business this time last year.

Virignie Maisonneuve, the ex-Schroders fund manager charged with growing the business at Pimco is reportedly leaving the firm. Douglas Hodge, Pimco’s chief executive, said Maisonneuve’s exit was precipitated by a change of, “approach to focus on areas that are more fully aligned with our capabilities and clients’ needs.” Bloomberg says Pimco’s active equity funds are being liquidated. Where this leaves the 16 people Maisonneuve was supposed to have hired isn’t clear. – Liquidated too, we suppose.

Meanwhile:

Adam Joy, ex-head of media banking at UBS, joined Warner Bros in 2011 and is now leaving for KPMG. He says he’s “keen to get back into the advisory world.” (Financial News) 

J.P. Morgan’s theory about the euro bond sell-off: ‘when volatility is low, as it was for many months before the sell-off, the value at risk models suggest it is safe to increase their exposure, but once the markets start to tumble and volatility picks up, the models tell investors to reduce their holdings.’ (The Times) 

Citi was poaching clients from rival banks with an ‘Alternative Credit Program’ that allowed a small group of coveted clients to trade FX without going through normal risk procedures. The unit has been closed after some of the clients made big losses. (WSJ) 

LSE graduate and ex-banker turned start-up entrepreneur claims to have no money to support ex-wife and children. (NY Post) 

“If you’ve had a big fall [at work] and then go straight back in, you’ll be in denial mode. Go away and lie on a beach. Recuperate and spend some time working out what went wrong. Spend the time building some resilience. Accept what has happened.” (Telegraph) 

The strength of your handshake predicts the length of your life. (Economist)  

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