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Morning Coffee: Traders revealed as incredibly stupid and naive, again; Jamie Dimon’s daughter comes to his defense

Laura Dimon

Laura Dimon

We’ve had Bollinger and Big Boy at Barclays and we’ve had Captain Chaos at UBS. As of today, we also have groups of unspecified traders calling themselves, ‘The Bandits’ Club’ and ‘The Cartel.’

Neither name creates an impression of propriety or ethical behaviour. Both names suggest traders are stupidly naive about their invulnerability to accusations of wrongdoing and prosecution.

The newest names were used by groups of currency traders during electronic chat sessions. Richard Usher, head of spot trading for G10 currencies at JPMorgan, is said to have been among those chatting with the Bandits et al. Usher indulged in the chat while he worked at RBS pre-2010. Usher currently remains in employment at JPMorgan. UBS is said to have dismissed Roger Boehler and Niall O’Riordan, its global head of FX trading and co-global head of FX G-10 and emerging market spot trading, as part of its own investigation into accusations of currency manipulation.

Separately, Jamie Dimon’s daughter has been defending him on Twitter. In a move reminiscent of Nell Diamond, who instructed her father’s detractors to ‘HMD’ when Bob Diamond was criticized following his resignation, Laura Dimon has praised U.S. journalist Andrew Ross Sorkin for writing a balanced article about her father.

Laura Dimon 1

Sorkin’s article, titled ‘Hero or Goat?’, includes citations suggesting alternately that Dimon is ‘one of the best CEO’s of any company in the world,’ and that he should be fired for overseeing failures that have been “egregious and systematic.”

In another Tweet, Laura explains that she’s attempted to persuade her father to stop using hackneyed idioms, without success.

Laura Dimon 2

And in another, she reveals that Jamie has such a thing as a ‘newspaper couch’, seen below.

Newspaper couch

 

Meanwhile:

Nobel Prize winning economist gives speech to finance graduates: ‘Finance, at its best, does not merely manage risk, but also acts as the steward of society’s assets and an advocate of its deepest goals.’ (Project Syndicate) 

“The harm done to the global financial system by a Treasury debt default would not be caused by cash losses to bond investors. If you needed that interest payment, you could always just sell your Treasury bill instead, for an amount extremely close to the total principal and interest due. Rather, the harm done would be a function of the way in which the Treasury market is the risk-free vaseline which greases the entire financial system. If Treasury payments can’t be trusted entirely, then not only do all risk instruments need to be repriced, but so does the most basic counterparty risk of all. The US government, in one form or another, is a counterparty to every single financial player in the world…” (Felix Salmon) 

Hyper-hypothecation is a thing in London and encourages regulatory arbitrageurs to settle there. (Wealth Management) 

Bank of China, Industrial and Commercial Bank of China, China Construction Bank and Agricultural Bank of China could all soon open wholesale branch offices in the UK under a new plan for lighter-touch regulation. (Financial Times)  

Jefferies is still hiring, in New York. (Bloomberg) 

Small US investment bank has hired 15 people from Lazard. (Bloomberg) 

Are you a dandy? (Dandyism)

 

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