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The most irritating CV introduction ever written

“I have extensive experience in the results-oriented, fast-paced financial services space. A truly innovative and dynamic team player, I have a proven track record around problem solving and client delivery. Highly motivated, I am looking to develop my career in the entrepreneurial environment of investment banking.”

Do not say this on your CV.

Do not even say just that you are “motivated,” “dynamic,” or have, “extensive experience.”

Everyone says this. You will sound vapid. And annoying

Earlier this week, Linked In released an interesting list of words most people commonly use on their profiles. They were:

Extensive experience; innovative; motivated; results-oriented; dynamic; proven track record; team player; fast-paced; problem solver; entrepreneurial.

Interestingly, people on LinkedIn favour a different vapid word depending upon their geographical location. UK people like to call themselves ‘motivated.’ US, Canadian and Australian people like to say they had ‘extensive experience.’ The French, Germans, Italians and Dutch like to consider themselves, ‘innovative.’


You are NOT Stuart Baggs

City pundits with perspectives on financial services careers warn of the dangers of emulating Stuart Baggs, the failed Apprentice contestant known for making hyberbolic and ultimately
unfounded claims about himself.

“You don’t need to tell anyone that you’re ambitious and motivated,” says Michael Moran, chief executive of outplacement and career services provider Fairplace. “This is for potential employers to decide during an interview.”

“Every single person writes that they’re motivated,” says Trevor Symons at recruitment firm Selby Jennings. “Candidates should focus on highlighting their unique selling points rather than filling a CV with how motivated and enthusiastic they are.”


You ARE an equity researcher with a CFA accreditation and a top Extel ranking

Instead of fatuous waffle, you need to be specific in your CV about the roles you’ve done, the qualifications you’ve got and the precise things you’ve achieved. This way, you will be identified by recruiters conducting word searches, points out Moran.

It’s also questionable whether you need to include hobbies. “It’s ok for entry level monkeys to mention hobbies. But at our level I don’t care whether they play golf, go swimming, or run naked in the summer,” says one headhunter. “It has no impact on their ability to do the job.”

Comments (5)

Comments
  1. If people insist on keeping the above on their CVs then they should expect to be quizzed about it.

  2. If people insist on keeping the above on their CVs they should be stripped naked and pelted with the detritus that gathers beneath toenails.

  3. “at our level I don’t care whether they play golf,..”

    Depends on the level. I for one would be impressed by a golfing mollusc…

    Father Christmas Reply
     
  4. this CV entry is far more creative than any job description on this site ….

  5. Damm that is taken exactly from my CV

    WHY HAS THIS BEEN DONE WITHOUT PERMISSION.

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