UK
JPMorgan
Dimon’s darlings may have delivered net income of $3.1bn for the investment bank in 2007 while all else (except Goldman Sachs) fell apart, but they won’t be paid anything extra for their efforts.
The bank’s 4Q results reveal that 148 of their number were culled between October and January, while average total compensation per JPMorgan investment banker declined nearly 10% to $312k (158k). This is less than the average at Morgan Stanley ($343k), whose bankers did considerably worse.
Citigroup
Citigroup’s investment banking and markets bankers lost $5.3bn in 2007 and received a more-deserved fiscal spanking as a result – compensation and benefits expenditure for their business also fell nearly 10%.
Citi doesn’t divulge precisely how many people it employs in its ‘markets and banking’ business, but a spokesperson in New York tells us it’s around 65,000. This makes the average pay package just $162k.
There was some good news for Citigroup bankers, however – new boss Vikram Pandit didn’t reveal plans to eliminate 30,000 employees as predicted, but did (according to Bloomberg) report that cuts of 17,500 were a ‘down payment’ on things to come.
Merrill Lynch
Merrill outdid even Citigroup and achieved a net loss for continuing operations of $8.6bn.
Little surprise, therefore, that the total comp bill fell nearly 6% on 2006, even while employee numbers for the year rose more than 14%. As a result, average total compensation per Merrill employee (brokers included) fell around 20% to $247k and Thain’s quoted in the FT today as saying bonus payouts were a ’60-40′ mix of stock and cash (that’s 60% stock, naturally).
John Thain had some good news for Merrill’s bankers, however. Merrill may have added 8,000 new people over 2007, but it won’t be rushing to get rid of them all at once. Thain reputedly said, “This is not a case where, you know, we are targeting thousands and thousands of people [for redundancy],” according to the Wall Street Journal.
Bank of America, Credit Suisse and Deutsche Bank
Neither B of A, Credit Suisse, nor DB announced their results this week, but each felt the need to announce redundancies all the same. Bank of America is getting rid of 650 people, according to Reuters, Credit Suisse announced 150 redundancies from its London securities arm, and Deutsche Bank is cutting 300 people from its global markets arm, some of whom will be in London, according to the Times.
Dresdner, meanwhile, quietly got rid of two people from algorithmic trading.
Yes, that was me!
and me too
Yes,that was him, and I am the other one. He works at Starbucks and I work at Pret’s.
is that why I always get the wrong change in starbucks now?
Don’t blame the trader for the wrong change, blame his model!
what i kept back as change at Starbucks was complexity premium. Try Pret’s where you’ll pay sterling & get your change in Euros.
I’m at costa now
Well I was number 148 at JP. They lined us up like cattle and just counted until they got bored. By the time it got to my part of the queue, all the good Starbucks jobs had gone, and there’s no way I’m working at Café Nero. I’m not that desperate
Moved from a top notch house to Pret’s myself – have to say my new bosses at Pret’s are so much better than the ones I had in Banking, where they all got fired anyway
Hear EAT is good, though not necessarily considered a ‘pure coffee bar play’. At Coffee Republic myself. Latte making much harder than structuring CDOs that’s for sure.
Too many ABS people in the coffee/sandwich business, I’ve made a smart move and fixed myself a 1-yr contract as a bus driver. Get to do the City route anyways and the wife hasnt found out yet.
Oh great. I got to final round for the Bus Driving route and was told that they had seen a “better qualified candidate” and they would bear me in mind for other opportunities. If I don’t get anything by next week, I’m going to become the first caucasian to start offering soap and lollipops in toilets
Bus driving is the closest to the physics that I read before Banking, may I strongly recommend Arriva. I heard they’re running a recruitment drive in the City next week.
Never underestimate the importance of a good brand on your CV – just lost final round interview with Pret’s to a guy who had Citi on the resume… I had 2nd tier European bank
Got a lesson of humility from my Starbucks manager the other day. After my seventh (and deliberate) attempt to give the wrong change to customers, she stared at me and in her Polish accent said: “You not in banking anymore. You don’t screw customers here”.
Do you get tips in the coffee places? I need to make abot 220k in tips on top of min wage.All advice welcome.
I’m the number 649 from BOA. Now I work at King Burger (The conversion is very easy since I used to trade Junk Bonds and now I trade Junk Food)
Sacked last month STOP Split from g/f STOP Traveled Australia and Brasil STOP Been doing lots of sport STOP Learning Spanish STOP Redundancy good for 2 years STOP Will be back next cycle STOP See you in 2009 STOP
Still, I bet you don’t use Fair Trade coffee and you exploit the poor farmers of underdeveloped countries. But this time this won’t get you a bonus.
what’s the interview process like at starbucks. is it any harder than Pret’s. I’ve just completed a doctorate in quants and have an MBA from INSEAD. I’ve heard they do a lot of testing and try to catch you out. I really need this job but am worried about the competition.
Guys – you’re wasting your time, I interviewed recently for a Polish builder, cash in hand and all I have to do is mumble and nod when people ask if I’m a qualified plumber!
Hiring freeze at Pret’s due to PE buyout talk. Great rates upto 100+/hr in the plumbing business, but that’s saturating quick with ABS bankers. Increasing demand for truck drivers – continental Europe. French/Italian/Spanish language skills desirable.
I see him everyday outside our offices and know I can do a better job – I just know it. And I would work for less pay than him if given the opportunity. Let me tell you this – I could sweep up cigarette butts faster and more efficiently than anyone in the City and I want that guy’s job. I want to tell my grandchildren one day how brilliantly I could clean up the pavements – yes, i do…i do…
You’re wasting time.. youre all too underqualified to do these top notch jobs at these premier top tier coffee houses. stick to doing something easy. like banking.
Plazmic & Blackberry are looking for top talent – with high scores of 25,000+ in BrickBreaker. Recruitment & Gaming competition at Trafalgar Sq at the steps of the National Art Gallery on Sat 26/Jan at 11AM. Bring your own Blackberry.
Great news !! at last i can use my Blackberry…
Why are you for make kofee? Nice for working LORGE bonk, mage bonus for burchase large laxary wotch, fast caprice, make donce in stylish nightyclub. michel jockson number wan.
i travelling long time on mule and hide in iron box on ship. i come to near london where street have the gold in pavements. i picking sprouts in field -many sprouts like monies i earn soon in money bank – no mules for me buster !! i drive car – not lada but it has the two exhaust pipe. you sees i not cost much and job easy to get after sprouts.
I now have great job satisfaction shovelling chicken bits at KFC at Liverpool Street. I may make head chicken bits sorter by the end of the year. Nicer boss now and free uniform the perks just keep coming!!
i want a job at GS, are they taking?
All these stories are a great lesson of humility for everybody. We are paying back for years of excess (too much money, living beyond our possibilities, too much arrogance and presumption). Now that we have earned this, let’s make a fresh start and make a better and a fairer society.
een khezeksten vee say – CDO banker with bonus ees like horse with weengs!
Why don’t you all come and work in private equity – we do hardly any work, get paid as much or more, have more fun and buy coffee bars – my firm bought a chain so I like to think I work in the coffee bar business, but without having to put up with banker types.
May we make a better and fair and more beautiful charming good-looking sexy society, and ye ye hear ye all, let there be world peace while we’re at it
The coffee, bus-driver, trucker, plumbing & sandwich businesses have filled up. Does anyone want to move to the back-orifice from the front office ?
Fortunately before embarking on a risky career in the city, I took my dad’s advice, I got a back-up plan. I’m also a musician – now there is a nice and steady career with no risk of the R word.
Organ Polisher?
I enjoyed this thread very much. Usually all the comments in this rag are from people with no sense of humour and their head a long way up their arse. Thanks guys
Guys that’s a pity I feel so ashamed now because I just got an offer from Goldman to trade on coffee futures after 5 years serving at Starbucks and things just go so well because I always knew I should focus on transferable skills
I hear that coke dealers are facing hard times as well. Where will it end?
Dear All, now my dream is true. I is albanian equities person.I send picture to my families of me in suit on dealing floor. I have 2 phones like the yuppy person and i have the stripe shirt (cool mauve and yellow) and yes, a silver suit. no more bedsit in Dollis Hill for me. I wants to help yuppies and i tell our families has caravans and burger bars by road in Tirana and i can gets you jobs there. no problems.
well i deliver pizzas after work…anyone from operations willing to do a straight swap??let me know….
all this hype about coffee bar jobs and plumbing is not putting me off the finance world. If there is no risk, there is no gain. Lets have a rest and see you guys in 2010!
Guys, my dream is unfolding before my eyes. Got a position at Ultimate Burger!! Although its back office for now, I think its great! What should I do to move from back office (cleaning, taking out rubbish) to a front office role? I want to work more closely with clients!!
Bought a jobtion today. It cost me a lot of money. It gives me an option to work for StarBucks from 20th of March. However, if you need it more than I do, then please get in touch. Happy to sell it to you at a premium.
Whats your offer mate ?